Ep. 67 | 2 Bears, 1 Cave w/ Tom Segura & Bert Kreischer

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Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer start off this episode of 2 Bears, 1 Cave by discussing the time Bert's spent in Rome. They also talk about how fast Bert is in the bedroom, shooting their Super Bowl commercials, Marilyn Manson's abuse accusations, Dustin Diamond's passing, and their most extreme heckler stories.


  1. Tommy Gunn

    Tommy Gunn

    پیش روز

    I love when bert starts going off about white people saying the n word and then it cuts to tom looking right at the camera.

  2. buildfear


    پیش 2 روز

    Hey Bert, it's not "crazy" that you were in something with an equally privileged person who grew up well-off and comfortable. It's a coincidence at best. It happens all the time to people who grew up in a relatively wealthy, comfortable, middle-class environment, and the fact you are so painfully unaware of that is something you should have a think about.

    • Mikon


      پیش روز

      Lmao shut up, touch grass.

  3. Steven Piontkowski

    Steven Piontkowski

    پیش 2 روز

    I love all your stories. Cash Levy has a great story about a man with a snake on his hat. Its on their podcast. Keep up all the lifestyle choices and being honest its rad and unique.

  4. Remy


    پیش 5 روز

    I wish i had yalls weed tolerance! I think i'm getting some blood in my thc stream. I consume flowers, oils and edibles enuff that they've pretty much stopped working. I can dip into a jar of distillate like winnie the pooh dips into jars of honey. And with this damn pandemic... makes taking a tolerance break extra difficult. so, careful Tom, you can be 2 gram Tom before 2 long...

  5. yetipd100


    پیش 6 روز

    Hey Bert you should be more inclusive to conservatives. They still can be your fan

  6. Noah Weisz

    Noah Weisz

    پیش 7 روز

    Does anyone know what the history podcast is called?

  7. Blake Guzman

    Blake Guzman

    پیش 8 روز

    Thank you for that last segment. More fail stories please!

  8. Fiberton


    پیش 9 روز

    AOC was not at the Capitol. She was at a office building a 1/4 mile away as a crow fly's. Much farther by foot. No one was at her building. Crazy that people stormed the Capitol but she is being hyperbolic.

  9. John Marino

    John Marino

    پیش 9 روز

    What the fuck I was born in bryn mar hospital too

  10. MrPierreBoch


    پیش 11 روز

    Heh this Bart guy is really funny

  11. Ethan S.

    Ethan S.

    پیش 11 روز

    If you actually believe bert’s story at the end. You’re an idiot.

  12. Orange Surfer

    Orange Surfer

    پیش 11 روز

    Bert is so fucking stupid funny ,omfg .

  13. Andrew Justus

    Andrew Justus

    پیش 12 روز

    Tom I went and saw you a few years ago in Springfield Missouri and there was a “Karen” in the audience and she was disruptive throughout your whole set and I’m honestly sad you didn’t address it

  14. Anthony Radosti

    Anthony Radosti

    پیش 12 روز

    Hey tommy dip shit you’re taking too many edibles too late. Take fast acting edibles that act within 20 minutes, this limits the tolerance rising.

  15. Daniel


    پیش 13 روز

    I'm sure "gangbangers" were at the show Bert....

  16. John McClane

    John McClane

    پیش 13 روز

    1:03:05 the joey diaz 1000mg edible guide

  17. Gonzo Got Games

    Gonzo Got Games

    پیش 13 روز

    Bert Reminds me of Risitas on IRface. Please search it up! Respectfully.

  18. Blake Harrison

    Blake Harrison

    پیش 13 روز

    Does Bert not know Life According to Jimmy

  19. Blake Harrison

    Blake Harrison

    پیش 14 روز

    I grew up an Alabama fan but Bo Jackson is a freak of nature, truly unreal talent

  20. JBreezy87


    پیش 14 روز

    Nobody was gonna kill AOC and fyi her story was full of shit.

    • Hayden Prunest

      Hayden Prunest

      پیش 13 روز

      that pissed me off so much.

  21. Zachary Murray

    Zachary Murray

    پیش 14 روز

    Derran brown did it where he got a studio audience to vote to kill someone using mob mentality

  22. Special Officer Doofy

    Special Officer Doofy

    پیش 14 روز

    2 of the least “funny” “comics” out there. Seriously this is a fuckin disgrace

  23. Alex ❽

    Alex ❽

    پیش 14 روز

    Bruce “I just discovered self-control” Kirchner

  24. Steven Phillips

    Steven Phillips

    پیش 14 روز

    AOC wasn't even in the same building when that shit went down.

  25. brokenathkete07


    پیش 14 روز

    Sapp ran a 4.3

    • brokenathkete07


      پیش 14 روز

      Lied. 4.69

  26. allyson vastano

    allyson vastano

    پیش 14 روز

    The show exists it was called boiling point

  27. Corey Goodin

    Corey Goodin

    پیش 15 روز

    Hershel Walker fought a pro MMA fight when he was like 50 and he had a 6 pack.

  28. Charlie Nice

    Charlie Nice

    پیش 15 روز

    You gotta watch the real bros of Simi Valley

  29. Shardhoney


    پیش 15 روز

    "AOC could have gotten killed" ok but she wasnt even at the capitol she was in her office playing soldier lol ohh Bert

  30. mark smith

    mark smith

    پیش 15 روز

    The worst thing about cancel culture? Seeing 2 grown men held by their balls forced to sing falsetto

  31. Finstor


    پیش 15 روز

    Buck O'neil was one of the greatest guys to listen to, talking baseball.

  32. somecsguy


    پیش 15 روز

    That lump under the armpit comment was almost definitely nick dipaolo. Saw him use it at the Cellar once

  33. john asshat

    john asshat

    پیش 17 روز

    MTVs boiling points is very similar to the tv idea Bert described.

  34. Malcolm Exxx

    Malcolm Exxx

    پیش 17 روز

    “I gotta be the guy that brings you to your lowest place.” what lmao.

  35. Hejcior


    پیش 18 روز

    42:00 wonder how many times Tim slipped and said "shit more" while reading that commercial.

  36. Adam Groves

    Adam Groves

    پیش 18 روز

    Tom keeps bert around for comic relief

  37. Matt McLellan

    Matt McLellan

    پیش 18 روز

    I really do wanna see Bruce and Tom do crack. I can’t even begin to imagine Bart even more talkative!

  38. Nerdvana North

    Nerdvana North

    پیش 18 روز

    Bert is slippin

  39. smokinone951


    پیش 19 روز

    AOC would not have been killed. lmfao, she wasnt even there, she had been evacuated already. shes already been called out on it,

  40. 19Burgandy


    پیش 19 روز

    Bert is such typical judgmental liberal. "He huts so he must have bad political views..... Always attacking are fucking right to bear arms how we fuckingn became a independent country

  41. 19Burgandy


    پیش 19 روز

    Bert can be a little pussy when it comes to saying certain things.... Only gives power to ppl that wana cancell anyone for anything so they get s power trip and maybe their name gets mentioned once.........

  42. Bobo The Clown

    Bobo The Clown

    پیش 19 روز

    Boiling point was on MTV

  43. Aaron Whitesel

    Aaron Whitesel

    پیش 19 روز

    Bert I would like to help you with your road rage. As someone who suffers from a similar affliction and has figured out how to cope with it I feel as though I may have some insight for you. A few tiny changes could impact your daily travels for the rest of your life.

  44. Exnier


    پیش 20 روز

    When Bert pauses and stares blankly before he talks you know it’s “uh-hundred” percent a made up story.

  45. Brandon Calder

    Brandon Calder

    پیش 20 روز

    Alcohol really helps your body respond well to exercise haha

  46. Lighthouse094


    پیش 20 روز

    C'mon fellas, way to ostracize more of your fan base. "Sneaky conservative" he hints so his politics must be out there. Bart you keep doing this, "I never talk about politics"and then you underhandedly cut down conservatives. Maybe take a look at politics from more than Facebook and the other people in California. Most of your fan base isn't in blatant liberal states. Smh

  47. Chano


    پیش 20 روز

    I used to look forward to this podcast

  48. Timewaits4no1


    پیش 20 روز

    🐦y is so beautifully full of $hit. It's actually amazing. I mean who else justifies taking multiple shots of whisky @ 6am as "celebrating my power!"

  49. Jason Machado

    Jason Machado

    پیش 20 روز

    Don’t believe Bert was in the right about that driving incident, don’t usually believe anything he says tbh lol

  50. anthony petty

    anthony petty

    پیش 20 روز

    " I have to be the guy to take you to your lowest place"...every guys dream, lol

  51. Jake Romanciwicz

    Jake Romanciwicz

    پیش 20 روز

    Playing with the turd 🤣🤣🤣🤣

  52. Cj Savvage

    Cj Savvage

    پیش 20 روز

    These two are the heaviest lightweights ive ever seen ... i eat 1000mg of thc no problem. And as far as Xanax goes well half a mg seems very low.. lol

    • Taylor Goetz

      Taylor Goetz

      پیش 19 روز


  53. Shaun Morris

    Shaun Morris

    پیش 20 روز

    Heard Louisville, got excited. Story continued, less excited.

  54. Hermes Sanchez

    Hermes Sanchez

    پیش 20 روز

    I ran 6 miles is blane kristna's speak for walked from the toilet to the coich. No way he's running even 2 miles a day

  55. Ryan Jones

    Ryan Jones

    پیش 21 روز

    The difference with the rage situation was you had the wherewithal to stfu and not get yourself caught up in some bs. People who don’t must reap what they sow.

  56. Ryan Jones

    Ryan Jones

    پیش 21 روز

    STOP COMPARING XANAX AND EDIBLE BRUCE. Xanax fucks your body up

  57. Ryan Jones

    Ryan Jones

    پیش 21 روز

    50mg would kill Brent, uh-oh

  58. Ryan Jones

    Ryan Jones

    پیش 21 روز

    “The key is the smoke weed all the time” -Tommy Amen brother!

  59. Still squeezin'

    Still squeezin'

    پیش 21 روز

    Turns out Bruce Kreischner does not only smell bad and makes love to dogs, he also can't let go of the racism.

  60. Chris Dennis

    Chris Dennis

    پیش 21 روز

    It's like Burt only knows one word for when he likes something... obsessed. lol we'll have to come up with a new disorder for him...OOD. Obsessive Obsessed Disorder lol

    • Paul LeBon

      Paul LeBon

      پیش 19 روز


  61. Joe Jim

    Joe Jim

    پیش 21 روز


  62. The Postman

    The Postman

    پیش 21 روز

    Aoc wasn't in the building. She fabricated her story. Tim Pool breaks it down really well

  63. Steven Asplund

    Steven Asplund

    پیش 21 روز

    Bob interrupted ted’s story as soon as it was getting good 😢

  64. Jamie Lertoria

    Jamie Lertoria

    پیش 21 روز

    Bert "I had a boyfriend" Kreischer.

  65. R S.A

    R S.A

    پیش 21 روز

    I might be super late.. But wtf happened to the opening theme song with the bear? It was really good. Did the guy that mixed it pull some copyright shit and the bears had to nix it from their episodes?

  66. DM R

    DM R

    پیش 21 روز

    The storming the capitol was a complete joke with staged photo ops. There were four deaths, none of them related to the protesters' "violence". An obvious psyop. Can't even believe the legitimacy of those supposed deaths. Dum dum Tom

  67. Paul Salibe Jr.

    Paul Salibe Jr.

    پیش 21 روز

    AOC was not gonna get killed nor was she close to being killed. Jesus Christ

  68. Jack Jack

    Jack Jack

    پیش 22 روز

    Hey Tom, can you replace Bert with Josh Potter. Bert is annoying as hell. Seems like he shovels down adderall and bitches about rolling on molly too much.

  69. Craig Brinkman

    Craig Brinkman

    پیش 22 روز

    You don't want crack you want freebase

  70. Spencer Rugg

    Spencer Rugg

    پیش 22 روز

    I wish it wasnt so obvious that they only listen to CNN

    • Paul LeBon

      Paul LeBon

      پیش 19 روز

      I'm glad that it's obvious that they have a healthy contempt for Fox "News."

  71. Jessy John Tavares

    Jessy John Tavares

    پیش 22 روز

    Okay like I ain't trying to flex. But I'm a Canadian bong smoker 😂😂 and like 100 milligrams is basically what I'll do every night. 100 mg Jessy every night no devil seen. Joey Diaz is the only comic I would be scared to do edibles with. It's just weird to hear people who aren't Canadian talk about their dosage, and I'm like whoa. We use cannabis alot up here if 100 ain't shit for me g

  72. Dillon Mann

    Dillon Mann

    پیش 22 روز

    Almost like "at da time Tommy" they did not get the same as the other guys

  73. pyro buscus

    pyro buscus

    پیش 22 روز

    hey, no. the people who caused violence in the capital were paid to do so. manufactured opposition. there were antifa members masquerading as Trumpers. in addition, trump said peacefully make your voices heard. he was aquited for incitement. because he didn't incite.

  74. Dillon Mann

    Dillon Mann

    پیش 22 روز

    What's up with screech dieing?

  75. Dillon Mann

    Dillon Mann

    پیش 22 روز

    So in episode 6 of the new Walker Texas Ranger TV show there's a character in the show that actually uses the term "nightmeer"

  76. deziree lynn

    deziree lynn

    پیش 22 روز

    smh bert... and right before persian new year😤

  77. Julie Burgoni

    Julie Burgoni

    پیش 22 روز

    Livestream was a blast!

  78. Anthony Jackson

    Anthony Jackson

    پیش 22 روز

    How do you go from talking about Nikki Glazer to five minutes later saying you didn’t no any girl that loves anal. When every podcast she’s on, 3 podcasts eps between the two of you, she talks about her love of anal. And how she prefers it.

  79. Teeguner -

    Teeguner -

    پیش 22 روز

    shity people stories should be a segment on this show I really enjoyed it.

  80. Jamie Sucie

    Jamie Sucie

    پیش 22 روز

    LOL! Working out has nothing to do with a person not getting COVID. Another great Bertism

  81. William Luca

    William Luca

    پیش 23 روز

    1:15:55 2 Bears 1 Cave historical moment! Tim told an interesting story without being cut off by Brent!

  82. gorillawarfair


    پیش 23 روز

    Dustin diamond got kinda screwed by saved by the bell. He carried that show but was only remembered as the jokey side character.

  83. Simon Malmgren

    Simon Malmgren

    پیش 23 روز

    was the guy with the bachelorett party Andrew Santino ? i could see him saying that

  84. Brandon Davis

    Brandon Davis

    پیش 23 روز

    If Bret smokes crack Tim wont get a word in

  85. Brien Davis

    Brien Davis

    پیش 23 روز

    These two sound so stupid talking about aoc she wasnt even in the building. Her story was proven false. The fuckin r words are so dumb sometimes

  86. Todd Strong

    Todd Strong

    پیش 23 روز

    Tom is quite good at plugging the product. That was my highlight of the podcast

  87. rick hietala

    rick hietala

    پیش 23 روز

    He stole the nightmere bit from William Montgomery

  88. Itachi Tsukuyomi DCUO

    Itachi Tsukuyomi DCUO

    پیش 23 روز

    Love how the SECOND Bret starts digging a hole for himself Tom hands him two more shovels and a miners helmet with a little light on it

    • Vinx-Splats


      پیش 16 روز

      lmaooo frr

    • Dom Velasquez

      Dom Velasquez

      پیش 21 روز

      I didn’t know why I loved these 2 so much... until I read this

    • James Masuda

      James Masuda

      پیش 21 روز

      This describes their friendship dynamic to a T

  89. Josh Harris

    Josh Harris

    پیش 23 روز

    GUYS I just heard another poor schmuck out here saying nightmeere AND it is in Episode 6 of Wanda Vision at 7 minutes 39 seconds SOMEONE PLEASE VERIFY this is driving me crazy now damn you Brent Bwahahaha

  90. Terrible Gamers

    Terrible Gamers

    پیش 23 روز

    Fuck saved by the bell, screech was the only good thing about that show

  91. Sean Li

    Sean Li

    پیش 23 روز

    The lowly refrigerator acromegaly order because prison plausibly pat mid a quizzical asparagus. woebegone, moaning spear

  92. Matt D

    Matt D

    پیش 23 روز

    Watch "the people's mayor" it's the funniest shit I've ever seen tom do

  93. Stefan Schulz

    Stefan Schulz

    پیش 23 روز

    Watching Bruce tip toe around potentially getting himself canceled in this podcast was like watching a drunk walrus ride a unicycle.

  94. Dave c

    Dave c

    پیش 23 روز

    Michael Jordan....

  95. J Keid

    J Keid

    پیش 23 روز


  96. Ogbose49


    پیش 23 روز

    Deion was track fast also. Don't forget about Hershal Walker.

  97. hatchbackhound


    پیش 23 روز

    We all know Bert and Tom can drink but. I have yet to hear about them drinking things out of their wheelhouse. Fancy wiskey, Fernet, Chartreuse, Absinthe...

  98. Brian Maisch

    Brian Maisch

    پیش 23 روز

    Bert is a bad person. He thinks it is funny to see if he can drive home before his Xanax impairs him. I am glad he didn't kill anyone that day.

  99. Crow47


    پیش 23 روز

    "Is tHeRe cOrOnA iN it??" -Bruce Kersher

  100. Michael Goodrich

    Michael Goodrich

    پیش 24 روز

    Put a 50 rock in a blunt. That is better then just crack.